@AngelaCMX: realize the 1st person think of is not the 1st person that other think of you
Then I realised, it's also partly my fault... And I deleted that tweet...
The purpose I post that tweet cause I suddenly feel lonely and thinks that no one thinks of me. I mean excluding my family, since they were closes to my everything. The closest friends I would like share everything and won't judge. I do have. But sometimes, I think that I'm not that person to them. Everyone have their own gang. I used to have one. It kinda fade away...
For example, I got this things and I want to share it and just tell this person, cause she/he is the 1st person I would like them to know. Later on, I realised that when the other person got something happening to their life... I'm not the first person to know... I know it's kinda selfish
And this post is kinda gonna sound like previous post about the jealousy. In a way... It's related.
When I deleted it, because it's who I am. When I get jealous... I do stupid things.. I ignore them. As in literally ignore my friends and pretend I didn't see them.
It me that didn't just show up when I see them, instead I see them giggle around, I would walk the other direction, cause a small part of my don't want to hurt more of not be part of it. In the end, it's my fault that I didn't join them. Later, I hurt more knowing they have more fun and I'm miserable...
Even I saw them and in fact... Ignore them. Some times, even they see me... They don't know whether approach me. Inside of my wanted to be approach by people, so I know that they want to know me or be one of them. Another hurt again, when they hesitate to come over me, but end up didn't approach me... Haiz....
That's my minor regrets of not approaching them. Peace out (Y)
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